








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 393 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 81 matches | ||
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1958 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,389 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5785 | 56% |
| Smokes | 1630 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 2095 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 879 | 8% |
Our logs show you have wasted $295,541 of utility $74 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 520 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nuer | 73% | 15 |
| #2 | Sensei.☯ | 73% | 15 |
| #3 | Krestophz | 72% | 18 |
| #4 | Wyy* | 70% | 10 |
| #5 | bulletmeister | 70% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | godbee`` |A|hs | 257 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #2 | Kuvzmin | 167 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #3 | ratoN | 108 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | K4rels | 100 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | slxzx | 92 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rose | +6.02 | 85 | 60 |
| #2 | nuer | +3.96 | 77 | 65 |
| #3 | aproxje | +3.90 | 84 | 56 |
| #4 | Sensei.☯ | +2.83 | 61 | 60 |
| #5 | bulletmeister | +2.06 | 84 | 70 |





