








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2444 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 856 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 65 matches | ||
| Faceit | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




127 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12185 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 34,294 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11273 | 33% |
| Smokes | 5371 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 11096 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 6554 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,085,536 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2075 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Itta | 67% | 79 |
| #2 | KayZf- | 60% | 80 |
| #3 | yumeZ | 58% | 738 |
| #4 | PLT | 55% | 453 |
| #5 | 乂卂丨 | 51% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Itta | 67% | 79 |
| #2 | KayZf- | 60% | 80 |
| #3 | yumeZ | 58% | 738 |
| #4 | PLT | 55% | 453 |
| #5 | 乂卂丨 | 51% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yumeZ | 99 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | PLT | 73 | 0.0074 |
| #3 | Itta | 11 | 0.0066 |
| #4 | 乂卂丨 | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | KayZf- | 3 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yumeZ | 1557 | 0.10 | 48 min |
| #2 | PLT | 770 | 0.08 | 16 min |
| #3 | Itta | 297 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #4 | 乂卂丨 | 266 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #5 | KayZf- | 124 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Itta | +2.26 | 88 | 59 |
| #2 | yumeZ | +1.72 | 93 | 60 |
| #3 | KayZf- | +1.53 | 86 | 52 |
| #4 | Hoffmann | +0.66 | 88 | 70 |
| #5 | 乂卂丨 | -1.03 | 59 | 60 |





