








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 337 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2449 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,704 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1830 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2226 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1492 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2156 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $792,837 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 441 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | $ashQuatchMay | 50% | 207 |
| #2 | Niul8 | 42% | 52 |
| #3 | Krusteeeee | 34% | 50 |
| #4 | vuvux | 29% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | $ashQuatchMay | 50% | 207 |
| #2 | Niul8 | 42% | 52 |
| #3 | Krusteeeee | 34% | 50 |
| #4 | vuvux | 29% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vuvux | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | $ashQuatchMay | 1 | 0.0002 |
| #3 | Niul8 | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | Krusteeeee | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | $ashQuatchMay | 231 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #2 | Krusteeeee | 201 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #3 | Niul8 | 123 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | vuvux | 117 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | klickarn | +1.45 | 60 | 53 |
| #2 | Niul8 | +0.63 | 58 | 65 |
| #3 | vuvux | -0.21 | 45 | 73 |
| #4 | $ashQuatchMay | -1.40 | 45 | 55 |
| #5 | Krusteeeee | -5.81 | 23 | 63 |





