








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 348 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 146 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1669 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,178 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1094 | 18% |
| Smokes | 1832 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2090 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1162 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,071,537 of utility $202 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 132 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Booner | 71% | 14 |
| #2 | Nienna | 55% | 31 |
| #3 | robb_ery | 54% | 35 |
| #4 | Deimos | 44% | 96 |
| #5 | Noah Hands | 39% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | robb_ery | 54% | 35 |
| #4 | Deimos | 44% | 96 |
| #5 | Noah Hands | 39% | 33 |
| #6 | Mary Ann | 31% | 36 |
| #7 | LordFuzzyNuts | 21% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Booner | 5 | 0.0185 |
| #2 | Deimos | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #3 | Mary Ann | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | LordFuzzyNuts | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Nienna | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mary Ann | 122 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #2 | Deimos | 70 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #3 | Booner | 58 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #4 | robb_ery | 54 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | LordFuzzyNuts | 27 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Booner | +5.92 | 89 | 69 |
| #2 | robb_ery | +4.83 | 52 | 56 |
| #3 | Noah Hands | +2.47 | 68 | 48 |
| #4 | Deimos | +1.57 | 61 | 45 |
| #5 | Mary Ann | +0.76 | 67 | 46 |





