








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 126 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 116 matches | ||
| Premier | 32 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2115 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,686 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2144 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2270 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2495 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1777 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $526,561 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JNKR | 63% | 19 |
| #2 | The Doctor | 62% | 29 |
| #3 | Joelo | 57% | 107 |
| #4 | Pulius | 56% | 32 |
| #5 | KESSU | 56% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | mela vaa :D | 51% | 45 |
| #9 | Headshot Machine | 50% | 32 |
| #10 | Töppyrä | 47% | 19 |
| #11 | rmk | 44% | 16 |
| #12 | 47v mittausteknikko | 43% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DnZ | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | oScSteve | 3 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | Joelo | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | mela vaa :D | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Töppyrä | 1 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joelo | 900 | 0.39 | 22 min |
| #2 | DnZ | 287 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #3 | mela vaa :D | 180 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #4 | 47v mittausteknikko | 55 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Headshot Machine | 43 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KESSU | +2.01 | 79 | 47 |
| #2 | Tapsa | +1.45 | 72 | 62 |
| #3 | DnZ | +1.12 | 71 | 66 |
| #4 | JNKR | +0.77 | 44 | 57 |
| #5 | The Doctor | +0.44 | 66 | 37 |





