








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 303 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 240 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 132 matches | ||
| Faceit | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8455 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,923 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4831 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3035 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3128 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3929 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,277,776 of utility $174 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 657 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BUI | 91% | 35 |
| #2 | helix | 89% | 57 |
| #3 | Waffe | 87% | 62 |
| #4 | InferNo | 87% | 143 |
| #5 | •dedaoler | 84% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr Shark | 13 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | InferNo | 10 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | yor1mato | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | helix | 4 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | ramuss | 3 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | InferNo | 898 | 0.32 | 21 min |
| #2 | Mr Shark | 526 | 0.28 | 15 min |
| #3 | yor1mato | 522 | 0.17 | 19 min |
| #4 | ws | 429 | 0.17 | 12 min |
| #5 | ramuss | 365 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bluek1ng | +4.44 | 95 | 57 |
| #2 | Waffe | +4.32 | 89 | 42 |
| #3 | helix | +3.80 | 96 | 67 |
| #4 | Mr Shark | +3.74 | 91 | 66 |
| #5 | ws | +3.27 | 85 | 71 |





