








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 89 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September

The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 184 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
886 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,527 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 537 | 10% |
| Smokes | 1287 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2554 | 46% |
| Molotovs | 1149 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $998,300 of utility $201 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 73 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kakk0n3n | 50% | 16 |
| #2 | välilihansyöjäkasvi | 50% | 18 |
| #3 | Taretzki | 50% | 34 |
| #4 | ArctixXx- | 44% | 162 |
| #5 | KEEB | 42% | 217 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Taretzki | 50% | 34 |
| #4 | ArctixXx- | 44% | 162 |
| #5 | KEEB | 42% | 217 |
| #6 | MikkoeZ | 42% | 229 |
| #7 | sLimbutin | 41% | 217 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KEEB | 20 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | MikkoeZ | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | sLimbutin | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | ArctixXx- | 5 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | kakk0n3n | 2 | 0.0063 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KEEB | 1018 | 0.22 | 33 min |
| #2 | ArctixXx- | 383 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #3 | sLimbutin | 212 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #4 | välilihansyöjäkasvi | 119 | 0.32 | 4 min |
| #5 | MikkoeZ | 115 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KEEB | +5.40 | 63 | 72 |
| #2 | välilihansyöjäkasvi | +2.61 | 69 | 65 |
| #3 | ArctixXx- | +2.03 | 58 | 65 |
| #4 | Taretzki | +0.30 | 35 | 74 |
| #5 | kakk0n3n | -0.86 | 24 | 77 |





