








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 154 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 230 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1703 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,390 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1308 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1607 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 902 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 573 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,157,799 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 71 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | välilihansyöjäkasvi | 48% | 25 |
| #2 | ArctixXx- | 45% | 186 |
| #3 | KEEB | 43% | 269 |
| #4 | MikkoeZ | 42% | 257 |
| #5 | yGySonni | 41% | 217 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ArctixXx- | 45% | 186 |
| #3 | KEEB | 43% | 269 |
| #4 | MikkoeZ | 42% | 257 |
| #5 | yGySonni | 41% | 217 |
| #6 | Taretzki | 41% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KEEB | 25 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | MikkoeZ | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | yGySonni | 7 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | ArctixXx- | 6 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | välilihansyöjäkasvi | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KEEB | 1243 | 0.22 | 40 min |
| #2 | ArctixXx- | 445 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #3 | Taretzki | 165 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | välilihansyöjäkasvi | 156 | 0.31 | 5 min |
| #5 | MikkoeZ | 136 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KEEB | +5.03 | 63 | 73 |
| #2 | välilihansyöjäkasvi | +1.90 | 70 | 65 |
| #3 | ArctixXx- | +1.86 | 57 | 65 |
| #4 | Taretzki | -0.78 | 33 | 69 |
| #5 | MikkoeZ | -2.32 | 23 | 31 |





