








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 291 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 121 matches | ||
| Premier | 114 matches | ||
| Wingman | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




103 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3375 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,103 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1789 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1999 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1697 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1618 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $781,844 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 267 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xDWRx (AFO) | 56% | 43 |
| #2 | Lukabuka | 49% | 49 |
| #3 | djskk | 48% | 50 |
| #4 | Nxftiis | 48% | 88 |
| #5 | juiced-enthusiast | 44% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Matteries | 382 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #2 | djskk | 180 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #3 | xDWRx (AFO) | 129 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #4 | Nxftiis | 118 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | juiced-enthusiast | 117 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | juiced-enthusiast | +2.80 | 76 | 51 |
| #2 | Nxftiis | +1.36 | 79 | 44 |
| #3 | xDWRx (AFO) | +1.12 | 55 | 61 |
| #4 | Lukabuka | +0.78 | 81 | 50 |
| #5 | Matteries | -0.11 | 75 | 54 |





