








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 486 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 56 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
893 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,978 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1221 | 41% |
| Smokes | 679 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 387 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 691 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $236,151 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 626 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ti jean 0617 | 81% | 21 |
| #2 | Punk Skunk | 77% | 13 |
| #3 | rollinzstoNes | 75% | 4 |
| #4 | MayoR | 75% | 20 |
| #5 | Pumbacet | 71% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Konflikt | 68% | 34 |
| #9 | R 0 B B 4 N | 64% | 11 |
| #10 | Twix | 60% | 5 |
| #11 | bitch please!!!! | 60% | 10 |
| #12 | V1SH4N | 57% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Konflikt | 7 | 0.0102 |
| #2 | ti jean 0617 | 2 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | bitch please!!!! | 2 | 0.0088 |
| #4 | Laggerino | 1 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Konflikt | 143 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #2 | ti jean 0617 | 143 | 0.32 | 3 min |
| #3 | MayoR | 85 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #4 | bitch please!!!! | 85 | 0.37 | 2 min |
| #5 | Punk Skunk | 63 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rollinzstoNes | +7.03 | 72 | 61 |
| #2 | kestom4 | +3.19 | 76 | 71 |
| #3 | ti jean 0617 | +2.14 | 72 | 61 |
| #4 | bitch please!!!! | +1.82 | 59 | 49 |
| #5 | MayoR | +1.80 | 79 | 67 |





