








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 83 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 14 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
370 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 802 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 201 | 25% |
| Smokes | 146 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 230 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 225 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $209,294 of utility $231 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 35 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kestom4 | 3 | 0.0153 |
| #2 | ti jean 0617 | 2 | 0.0110 |
| #3 | bitch please!!!! | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | InZanity | 1 | 0.0060 |
| #5 | POWER | 1 | 0.0132 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Punk Skunk | 155 | 0.28 | 4 min |
| #2 | bitch please!!!! | 112 | 0.26 | 3 min |
| #3 | MayoR | 57 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #4 | kestom4 | 55 | 0.28 | 2 min |
| #5 | ti jean 0617 | 49 | 0.27 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R 0 B B 4 N | +7.12 | 90 | 60 |
| #2 | POWER | +6.81 | 78 | 75 |
| #3 | ti jean 0617 | +6.40 | 75 | 59 |
| #4 | bitch please!!!! | +3.50 | 61 | 50 |
| #5 | Pumbacet | +2.95 | 71 | 64 |





