








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1088 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 165 matches | ||
| Premier | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3856 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,275 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4071 | 40% |
| Smokes | 3513 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1139 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 1552 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,062,373 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 868 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GustaMarega Lord | 55% | 172 |
| #2 | Messi | 54% | 87 |
| #3 | JUICE | 53% | 193 |
| #4 | Ecozin | 50% | 128 |
| #5 | Reaper | 46% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GustaMarega Lord | 55% | 172 |
| #2 | Messi | 54% | 87 |
| #3 | JUICE | 53% | 193 |
| #4 | Ecozin | 50% | 128 |
| #5 | Reaper | 46% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reaper | 12 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | JUICE | 7 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | GustaMarega Lord | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | Ecozin | 3 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JUICE | 453 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #2 | GustaMarega Lord | 409 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #3 | Ecozin | 312 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #4 | Reaper | 271 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #5 | Messi | 158 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ecozin | +3.48 | 79 | 72 |
| #2 | zff | +2.37 | 77 | 66 |
| #3 | Reaper | -1.08 | 69 | 59 |
| #4 | GustaMarega Lord | -1.62 | 53 | 64 |
| #5 | JUICE | -2.59 | 46 | 58 |





