








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 762 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 719 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 37 matches | ||
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9661 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,744 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3283 | 11% |
| Smokes | 9857 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 9168 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 8436 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,091,099 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 117 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NekoNoYami≧﹏≦ | 6 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | ❤︎ѕнє ԃєνιℓ❤ | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | -_-6`ü´6-.- | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Yami kr3at!ve | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Escobar | 4 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zuko1995 | 315 | 0.05 | 9 min |
| #2 | Yami kr3at!ve | 272 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #3 | NekoNoYami≧﹏≦ | 148 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | PanDvl | 124 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | ❤︎ѕнє ԃєνιℓ❤ | 112 | 0.03 | 3 min |





