








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 58 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1314 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,389 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1632 | 37% |
| Smokes | 386 | 9% |
| HE Grenades | 1665 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 706 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $334,758 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 180 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mace Hindu | 58% | 55 |
| #2 | rubtub | 58% | 43 |
| #3 | meatbeater | 56% | 72 |
| #4 | Ramen | 52% | 159 |
| #5 | snappy | 50% | 165 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ramen | 51 | 0.0166 |
| #2 | snappy | 33 | 0.0103 |
| #3 | Scrommyboy | 15 | 0.0092 |
| #4 | Mace Hindu | 13 | 0.0120 |
| #5 | rubtub | 12 | 0.0145 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | snappy | +6.13 | 59 | 46 |
| #2 | Mace Hindu | +6.09 | 76 | 52 |
| #3 | ุ | +3.53 | 76 | 56 |
| #4 | Ramen | +1.16 | 55 | 47 |
| #5 | Fella | -2.19 | 30 | 47 |





