








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 781 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 362 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 35 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4509 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,320 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6344 | 28% |
| Smokes | 5875 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5500 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 4601 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $645,401 of utility $68 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 25 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Monko | 44% | 25 |
| #8 | Z__ | 42% | 124 |
| #9 | Shady | 42% | 24 |
| #10 | MULKERS | 40% | 70 |
| #11 | siippari | 39% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hillo | 9 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | cLEEz | 6 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | Hurri | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Z__ | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | nn44mis | 3 | 0.0064 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hurri | 609 | 0.13 | 16 min |
| #2 | Hillo | 431 | 0.09 | 11 min |
| #3 | Z__ | 392 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #4 | cLEEz | 331 | 0.04 | 10 min |
| #5 | Arska | 207 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shady | +2.26 | 81 | 71 |
| #2 | Hillo | +1.61 | 68 | 62 |
| #3 | sHOwtimE | +1.01 | 66 | 71 |
| #4 | nn44mis | +1.01 | 49 | 71 |
| #5 | siippari | +0.34 | 51 | 44 |





