








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 22 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 118 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Renown | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2467 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,403 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1671 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1405 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2121 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2206 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $328,703 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FL1X | 89% | 19 |
| #2 | chico papi chulo | 57% | 107 |
| #3 | KALVNNN | 55% | 150 |
| #4 | Gohfakyu | 47% | 17 |
| #5 | St3in | 46% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FL1X | 89% | 19 |
| #2 | chico papi chulo | 57% | 107 |
| #3 | KALVNNN | 55% | 150 |
| #4 | Gohfakyu | 47% | 17 |
| #5 | St3in | 46% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chico papi chulo | 14 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | KALVNNN | 12 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | St3in | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Gohfakyu | 3 | 0.0085 |
| #5 | FL1X | 1 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KALVNNN | 735 | 0.23 | 18 min |
| #2 | chico papi chulo | 474 | 0.20 | 11 min |
| #3 | St3in | 207 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #4 | FL1X | 51 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | Gohfakyu | 6 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CRWNZ | +2.39 | 87 | 65 |
| #2 | chico papi chulo | +0.53 | 76 | 70 |
| #3 | KALVNNN | -0.15 | 63 | 71 |
| #4 | FL1X | -1.97 | 69 | 61 |
| #5 | St3in | -2.25 | 54 | 65 |





