








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 486 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 260 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 45 matches | ||
| Faceit | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6790 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,143 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8019 | 30% |
| Smokes | 6710 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5905 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 6509 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $699,907 of utility $58 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 165 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | l!kezzZ2ch!LL | 48% | 52 |
| #2 | Zuli #FotsShired | 48% | 65 |
| #3 | Frosty ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ | 46% | 115 |
| #4 | Shirley | 46% | 291 |
| #5 | Schnellmelk◥◣ ◢◤ | 46% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Red John | 10 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | Shirley | 4 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | Schnellmelk◥◣ ◢◤ | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Janiaros | 2 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | CrixX | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Red John | 297 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #2 | Frosty ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ | 240 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | Shirley | 140 | 0.02 | 3 min |
| #4 | Zuli #FotsShired | 115 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | Schnellmelk◥◣ ◢◤ | 77 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luzi | +2.92 | 78 | 67 |
| #2 | Zuli #FotsShired | +2.28 | 75 | 54 |
| #3 | CrixX | +0.77 | 90 | 66 |
| #4 | Frosty ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ | +0.61 | 74 | 52 |
| #5 | l!kezzZ2ch!LL | +0.40 | 58 | 53 |





