








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 314 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 243 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 50 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4379 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,690 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2633 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2900 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2449 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2708 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,336,155 of utility $195 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 317 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MAESTRO | 60% | 30 |
| #2 | Mr Meowcrew | 54% | 24 |
| #3 | TheTigsy | 50% | 26 |
| #4 | WRM | 50% | 26 |
| #5 | ✪VanDuuren | 48% | 194 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | WRM | 50% | 26 |
| #5 | ✪VanDuuren | 48% | 194 |
| #6 | Fearghal O'Farrell | 47% | 34 |
| #7 | Chris | 42% | 50 |
| #8 | Sotrox "Sotte" Taggen | 35% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪VanDuuren | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | Chris | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Fearghal O'Farrell | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Mr Meowcrew | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪VanDuuren | 657 | 0.17 | 19 min |
| #2 | Chris | 140 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | WRM | 93 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #4 | MAESTRO | 82 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | Fearghal O'Farrell | 52 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Marland | +3.39 | 89 | 64 |
| #2 | TheTigsy | +0.26 | 78 | 44 |
| #3 | MAESTRO | +0.05 | 46 | 90 |
| #4 | WRM | +0.05 | 59 | 62 |
| #5 | ✪VanDuuren | -1.12 | 51 | 72 |





