








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 758 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 119 matches | ||
| Faceit | 115 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 81 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3462 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,260 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2148 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2591 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2702 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2819 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,206,011 of utility $181 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 667 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | AndyS | 45% | 22 |
| #12 | xPsyc#HertaSpin | 45% | 42 |
| #13 | pall3hax | 44% | 109 |
| #14 | PadigS | 41% | 58 |
| #15 | Thorsen | 41% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | halal slagteren | 7 | 0.0118 |
| #2 | <viper>qlimax | 5 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | coDaZ! | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | pall3hax | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Thorsen | 2 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PadigS | 286 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| #2 | coDaZ! | 182 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #3 | xPsyc#HertaSpin | 178 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #4 | Joja | 177 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #5 | Thorsen | 117 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | coDaZ! | +3.85 | 87 | 65 |
| #2 | Joja | +1.90 | 86 | 67 |
| #3 | Hr. YOLO | El Capitan | +1.65 | 66 | 66 |
| #4 | Valina > UX700 | +1.42 | 56 | 58 |
| #5 | xPsyc#HertaSpin | +0.67 | 60 | 65 |





