








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 160 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1416 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,288 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1315 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1201 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1467 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1305 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $497,859 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 48 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MatscheMunkey | 7 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | x1reme | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | Davboy | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Supernova | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Lauchbou | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MatscheMunkey | 632 | 0.26 | 17 min |
| #2 | Davboy | 201 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #3 | x1reme | 180 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #4 | -DAnG3R- | 108 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #5 | Lauchbou | 101 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | x1reme | +2.80 | 76 | 63 |
| #2 | Döminator #Retard | +0.98 | 75 | 60 |
| #3 | Davboy | +0.85 | 82 | 65 |
| #4 | Lauchbou | +0.57 | 53 | 64 |
| #5 | infinitear | +0.53 | 69 | 18 |





