








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 185 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 426 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 108 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4110 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,659 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6776 | 36% |
| Smokes | 5854 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3790 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2239 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,152,344 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 538 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | foR | 54% | 108 |
| #2 | Bailz66 | 53% | 80 |
| #3 | negevjenkins | 50% | 111 |
| #4 | Tako | 50% | 315 |
| #5 | Wobbie | 49% | 169 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | negevjenkins | 50% | 111 |
| #4 | Tako | 50% | 315 |
| #5 | Wobbie | 49% | 169 |
| #6 | Crew | 43% | 61 |
| #7 | Baaaaaabs | 33% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | negevjenkins | 9 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | Wobbie | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Tako | 5 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | Crew | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Bailz66 | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tako | 449 | 0.07 | 11 min |
| #2 | negevjenkins | 293 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #3 | foR | 231 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #4 | Wobbie | 151 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #5 | Bailz66 | 109 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | foR | +1.99 | 75 | 72 |
| #2 | negevjenkins | +1.29 | 41 | 45 |
| #3 | Jerimi | +1.19 | 41 | 68 |
| #4 | Tako | +0.04 | 57 | 52 |
| #5 | Baaaaaabs | -0.58 | 32 | 50 |





