








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 19 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 132 matches | ||
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




61 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3308 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,080 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2986 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1888 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 3133 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 2073 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $760,386 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AcLi | 65% | 108 |
| #2 | menuditohelman | 64% | 211 |
| #3 | AcLi | 61% | 28 |
| #4 | PROFESSOR_TONY | 55% | 53 |
| #5 | Huevofest32 | 53% | 140 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | menuditohelman | 27 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | Huevofest32 | 18 | 0.0069 |
| #3 | PROFESSOR_TONY | 17 | 0.0160 |
| #4 | Flavio Mendoza | 16 | 0.0066 |
| #5 | DrKiwardo | 8 | 0.0093 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Huevofest32 | 435 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #2 | menuditohelman | 373 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #3 | PROFESSOR_TONY | 243 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #4 | AcLi | 203 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #5 | Flavio Mendoza | 152 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | menuditohelman | +5.68 | 87 | 58 |
| #2 | AcLi | +4.28 | 70 | 65 |
| #3 | ☁ | +2.68 | 73 | 61 |
| #4 | El Gorch | +2.32 | 79 | 55 |
| #5 | AcLi | +1.84 | 60 | 65 |





