








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 733 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 171 matches | ||
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2669 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,142 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3943 | 35% |
| Smokes | 2973 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1861 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 2365 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $401,074 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 745 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crileboy я его | 66% | 70 |
| #2 | FINNISH_AIM Ninja Turttle Man | 56% | 25 |
| #3 | aGu | 55% | 150 |
| #4 | SaS | 40% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crileboy я его | 66% | 70 |
| #2 | FINNISH_AIM Ninja Turttle Man | 56% | 25 |
| #3 | aGu | 55% | 150 |
| #4 | SaS | 40% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aGu | 41 | 0.0138 |
| #2 | SaS | 12 | 0.0165 |
| #3 | Crileboy я его | 6 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | FINNISH_AIM Ninja Turttle Man | 2 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aGu | 317 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #2 | Crileboy я его | 214 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #3 | SaS | 101 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | FINNISH_AIM Ninja Turttle Man | 28 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SettiMake | +2.17 | 66 | 65 |
| #2 | Crileboy я его | +1.64 | 59 | 66 |
| #3 | aGu | +0.22 | 67 | 39 |
| #4 | SaS | -2.02 | 33 | 36 |
| #5 | FINNISH_AIM Ninja Turttle Man | -2.75 | 16 | 39 |





