








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 473 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 143 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Esplay | 3 matches | 2,142 | |
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2573 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,326 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2156 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2355 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2168 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2647 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $628,663 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 198 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chameleon | 78% | 18 |
| #2 | deHyP3 | 67% | 18 |
| #3 | ॐ | 62% | 105 |
| #4 | muhammeds5head likes DOGballs | 58% | 24 |
| #5 | dazhai | 50% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ॐ | 62% | 105 |
| #4 | muhammeds5head likes DOGballs | 58% | 24 |
| #5 | dazhai | 50% | 14 |
| #6 | doja lök | 45% | 38 |
| #7 | kehz | 40% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ॐ | 11 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | doja lök | 6 | 0.0084 |
| #3 | kehz | 6 | 0.0224 |
| #4 | muhammeds5head likes DOGballs | 2 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | dazhai | 2 | 0.0076 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ॐ | 202 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #2 | muhammeds5head likes DOGballs | 90 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #3 | deHyP3 | 86 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #4 | dazhai | 55 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #5 | Chameleon | 42 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chameleon | +2.13 | 86 | 67 |
| #2 | ॐ | +1.23 | 92 | 53 |
| #3 | doja lök | +1.02 | 46 | 42 |
| #4 | muhammeds5head likes DOGballs | +0.95 | 81 | 50 |
| #5 | dazhai | +0.72 | 83 | 70 |





