








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5328 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1353 matches | ||
| Wingman | 352 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 82 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




171 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
19793 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,876 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10781 | 35% |
| Smokes | 6700 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 7915 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 5480 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $9,545,920 of utility $278 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16658 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deHyP3 | 77% | 176 |
| #2 | Throw | 69% | 372 |
| #3 | Chameleon | 66% | 196 |
| #4 | muhammeds5head likes DOGballs | 64% | 293 |
| #5 | dazhai | 62% | 150 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wuxl | 36 | 0.0126 |
| #2 | Chameleon | 16 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | dazhai | 16 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | muhammeds5head likes DOGballs | 14 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | deHyP3 | 14 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | muhammeds5head likes DOGballs | 959 | 0.17 | 23 min |
| #2 | Throw | 683 | 0.12 | 18 min |
| #3 | deHyP3 | 657 | 0.20 | 17 min |
| #4 | Wuxl | 638 | 0.22 | 18 min |
| #5 | dazhai | 578 | 0.20 | 14 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Throw | +3.64 | 77 | 64 |
| #2 | ॐ | +1.97 | 92 | 51 |
| #3 | Wuxl | +1.95 | 90 | 60 |
| #4 | ViTaL | +1.71 | 86 | 65 |
| #5 | Chameleon | +1.56 | 87 | 63 |





