








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 732 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 223 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 223 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 133 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




82 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7425 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 33,846 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8413 | 25% |
| Smokes | 8122 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 8056 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 9255 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,580,190 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2349 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | guxta | 76% | 87 |
| #2 | anarchy | 74% | 70 |
| #3 | mari | 73% | 99 |
| #4 | sOriN | 72% | 145 |
| #5 | f9ntasy A+ | 71% | 56 |





