








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 360 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 32 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




51 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2275 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,801 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3216 | 33% |
| Smokes | 2618 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1903 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2064 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $555,496 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 396 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rejjaN ΜΆΝ ΜΆΝ γ· | 77% | 35 |
| #2 | Savitar | 59% | 79 |
| #3 | Trulle | 58% | 33 |
| #4 | Turtle | 53% | 30 |
| #5 | Fraaank- | 47% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Turtle | 53% | 30 |
| #5 | Fraaank- | 47% | 17 |
| #6 | Hasse | 35% | 86 |
| #7 | Bagarn | 33% | 108 |
| #8 | πΉπͺπ«π΅πΈ | 30% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hasse | 46 | 0.0267 |
| #2 | Bagarn | 32 | 0.0150 |
| #3 | πΉπͺπ«π΅πΈ | 17 | 0.0315 |
| #4 | Turtle | 6 | 0.0103 |
| #5 | Savitar | 5 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Savitar | 377 | 0.25 | 11 min |
| #2 | Bagarn | 283 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #3 | Trulle | 121 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #4 | rejjaN ΜΆΝ ΜΆΝ γ· | 120 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | Hasse | 84 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fraaank- | +5.77 | 91 | 89 |
| #2 | rejjaN ΜΆΝ ΜΆΝ γ· | +4.21 | 77 | 75 |
| #3 | Savitar | +3.71 | 68 | 80 |
| #4 | Trulle | +3.02 | 88 | 64 |
| #5 | Hasse | +1.71 | 73 | 36 |





