








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 226 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1520 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,482 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1393 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1118 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1616 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1355 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $564,310 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 496 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TuroK | 72% | 18 |
| #2 | Zora | 64% | 14 |
| #3 | Thierry La Fronde | 57% | 23 |
| #4 | D O 🅻 I | 56% | 27 |
| #5 | SENSA | 54% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Chachibre | 48% | 44 |
| #9 | Master Cheese | 48% | 21 |
| #10 | BoB l'EponGe FonSder | 45% | 11 |
| #11 | 𝕃𝕆ℂ𝕂𝕎𝕆𝕆𝔻 | 43% | 63 |
| #12 | GROMICA | 40% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Avaladeen | 8 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | Chachibre | 5 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | 𝕃𝕆ℂ𝕂𝕎𝕆𝕆𝔻 | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Itachi Issouwa #MakeR8GreatAgain | 3 | 0.0055 |
| #5 | D O 🅻 I | 3 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Avaladeen | 226 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #2 | Chachibre | 141 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | D O 🅻 I | 122 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #4 | Itachi Issouwa #MakeR8GreatAgain | 106 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #5 | 𝕃𝕆ℂ𝕂𝕎𝕆𝕆𝔻 | 98 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | D O 🅻 I | +3.56 | 76 | 74 |
| #2 | SENSA | +3.39 | 85 | 59 |
| #3 | Itachi Issouwa #MakeR8GreatAgain | +1.72 | 65 | 69 |
| #4 | TuroK | +1.49 | 52 | 71 |
| #5 | Avaladeen | +0.67 | 58 | 62 |





