








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 881 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 468 matches | ||
| Faceit | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5815 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,061 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5356 | 19% |
| Smokes | 8569 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 6173 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 7963 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,098,647 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1708 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Remi | 71% | 48 |
| #2 | An0N_^ | 58% | 48 |
| #3 | Mr Shotgun | 55% | 33 |
| #4 | FluffyxBlanket | 54% | 50 |
| #5 | Holo25T | 53% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | iLLquid | 49% | 119 |
| #8 | Korra | 47% | 43 |
| #9 | lbertZ | 46% | 54 |
| #10 | wobbly^ | 46% | 39 |
| #11 | F5 | 39% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iLLquid | 7 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | Tambo 外国王者 | 5 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | An0N_^ | 5 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | FluffyxBlanket | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | wobbly^ | 3 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iLLquid | 485 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #2 | FluffyxBlanket | 277 | 0.27 | 8 min |
| #3 | An0N_^ | 240 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #4 | lbertZ | 232 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #5 | Holo25T | 156 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Remi | +4.35 | 92 | 44 |
| #2 | F5 | +2.12 | 68 | 64 |
| #3 | lbertZ | +1.94 | 84 | 60 |
| #4 | Korra | +1.15 | 70 | 51 |
| #5 | Pa7na | +0.56 | 66 | 60 |





