








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 369 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2192 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,781 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1721 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1750 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 847 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1463 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $485,982 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 441 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | anu | 85% | 13 |
| #2 | Narno_DK | 73% | 11 |
| #3 | TheGhoulette | 70% | 20 |
| #4 | $ Sparrow | 64% | 11 |
| #5 | . | 55% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Narno_DK | 73% | 11 |
| #3 | TheGhoulette | 70% | 20 |
| #4 | $ Sparrow | 64% | 11 |
| #5 | . | 55% | 20 |
| #6 | SharkFly | 54% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheGhoulette | 7 | 0.0174 |
| #2 | . | 6 | 0.0164 |
| #3 | SharkFly | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | Narno_DK | 1 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheGhoulette | 94 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| #2 | SharkFly | 91 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #3 | anu | 42 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | $ Sparrow | 31 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | Narno_DK | 28 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Olicsa | +5.51 | 94 | 67 |
| #2 | TheGhoulette | +2.85 | 91 | 58 |
| #3 | $ Sparrow | +0.32 | 81 | 49 |
| #4 | Narno_DK | -0.29 | 86 | 30 |
| #5 | . | -1.44 | 68 | 41 |





