








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1388 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Vertigo | 152 matches | ||
| Premier | 115 matches | ||
| Wingman | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 43 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3932 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,427 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2751 | 20% |
| Smokes | 4214 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 4224 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 2238 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,516,202 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 430 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mockiii | 55% | 71 |
| #2 | Erthilvego | 54% | 28 |
| #3 | ๋ | 52% | 23 |
| #4 | Gardox | 51% | 116 |
| #5 | Tiltaniel | 50% | 253 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mockiii | +3.20 | 91 | 49 |
| #2 | ๋ | +2.00 | 85 | 73 |
| #3 | Tiltaniel | +1.64 | 64 | 54 |
| #4 | Trainer | +0.83 | 55 | 69 |
| #5 | ♕Freddy✪|Bratwurstbratgerät | +0.45 | 62 | 52 |





