








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 164 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 99 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1498 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,726 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1732 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1937 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1760 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1297 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $378,513 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 210 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KllyVe ケリー | 49% | 39 |
| #2 | МΛЯCОМ | 47% | 57 |
| #3 | Bossi | 47% | 72 |
| #4 | Rimpel pik 3 | 45% | 29 |
| #5 | Aimiroan™ | 44% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Bossi | 47% | 72 |
| #4 | Rimpel pik 3 | 45% | 29 |
| #5 | Aimiroan™ | 44% | 43 |
| #6 | Höns | 32% | 28 |
| #7 | Rimpac | 31% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bossi | 7 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | Aimiroan™ | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | Rimpac | 2 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | МΛЯCОМ | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | KllyVe ケリー | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bossi | 175 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #2 | Höns | 102 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #3 | Rimpac | 79 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | МΛЯCОМ | 77 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | KllyVe ケリー | 71 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KllyVe ケリー | +2.64 | 88 | 60 |
| #2 | Bossi | +1.31 | 73 | 68 |
| #3 | Aimiroan™ | +1.25 | 66 | 63 |
| #4 | Höns | +0.50 | 76 | 72 |
| #5 | Th✪mSoN | -0.51 | 63 | 66 |





