








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1292 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 301 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 205 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 126 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




123 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11616 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 33,544 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12098 | 36% |
| Smokes | 7764 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 7554 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 6128 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,960,963 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1550 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BakedOut | 51% | 153 |
| #2 | TheEggGirl | 46% | 468 |
| #3 | ZOOOOOOOM | 45% | 99 |
| #4 | Leboknees | 45% | 429 |
| #5 | Osprey | 39% | 108 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Leboknees | 45% | 429 |
| #5 | Osprey | 39% | 108 |
| #6 | Apoc | 38% | 81 |
| #7 | Tuna Sandwich | 38% | 288 |
| #8 | Paradox | 35% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Leboknees | 94 | 0.0107 |
| #2 | Tuna Sandwich | 36 | 0.0060 |
| #3 | TheEggGirl | 29 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | ZOOOOOOOM | 20 | 0.0098 |
| #5 | BakedOut | 5 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Leboknees | 2128 | 0.24 | 41 min |
| #2 | TheEggGirl | 1735 | 0.18 | 37 min |
| #3 | Tuna Sandwich | 1315 | 0.22 | 26 min |
| #4 | ZOOOOOOOM | 414 | 0.20 | 11 min |
| #5 | BakedOut | 383 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Leboknees | +3.74 | 56 | 59 |
| #2 | ZOOOOOOOM | +1.64 | 55 | 55 |
| #3 | Donny The Dealer | +1.31 | 47 | 62 |
| #4 | BakedOut | +0.56 | 70 | 59 |
| #5 | Apoc | +0.40 | 49 | 50 |





