








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1374 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,552 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1177 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1264 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1264 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 847 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $283,911 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NewTnnn | 59% | 61 |
| #2 | Fau0cka Yu0 | 56% | 45 |
| #3 | HansenEZ | 53% | 125 |
| #4 | pIOTERkuuuuk1 | 50% | 111 |
| #5 | STJOM | 46% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NewTnnn | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | morty | 4 | 0.0133 |
| #3 | SylteRikard | 4 | 0.0230 |
| #4 | pIOTERkuuuuk1 | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | HansenEZ | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pIOTERkuuuuk1 | 347 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #2 | NewTnnn | 248 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #3 | HansenEZ | 242 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #4 | Fau0cka Yu0 | 58 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | SylteRikard | 52 | 0.30 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NewTnnn | +4.49 | 93 | 81 |
| #2 | SylteRikard | +2.85 | 89 | 85 |
| #3 | Starvin Marvin | +2.75 | 84 | 66 |
| #4 | morty | +2.17 | 86 | 66 |
| #5 | HansenEZ | +0.26 | 63 | 68 |





