








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 850 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 111 matches | ||
| Premier | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 113 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




62 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6459 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,212 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6134 | 25% |
| Smokes | 4349 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 7477 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 6252 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,451,232 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 868 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ADN | 73% | 136 |
| #2 | GURU | 71% | 56 |
| #3 | gawrie | 70% | 243 |
| #4 | PAUL!! | 66% | 83 |
| #5 | kah | 63% | 399 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | GURU | 71% | 56 |
| #3 | gawrie | 70% | 243 |
| #4 | PAUL!! | 66% | 83 |
| #5 | kah | 63% | 399 |
| #6 | c̷o̷c̷o̷ჯට | 61% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gawrie | 54 | 0.0117 |
| #2 | kah | 43 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | ADN | 12 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | c̷o̷c̷o̷ჯට | 12 | 0.0087 |
| #5 | PAUL!! | 9 | 0.0056 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kah | 1692 | 0.22 | 44 min |
| #2 | gawrie | 388 | 0.08 | 11 min |
| #3 | ADN | 220 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | PAUL!! | 160 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | GURU | 106 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PAUL!! | +4.90 | 79 | 58 |
| #2 | ADN | +4.68 | 78 | 58 |
| #3 | GURU | +4.03 | 77 | 51 |
| #4 | gawrie | +2.74 | 82 | 64 |
| #5 | kah | +2.12 | 79 | 66 |





