








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 272 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Premier | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




57 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3167 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,464 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1816 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2190 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1985 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1473 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $820,741 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 313 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GURU | 77% | 30 |
| #2 | ADN | 72% | 100 |
| #3 | jayy | 70% | 243 |
| #4 | kah | 67% | 138 |
| #5 | PAUL!! | 65% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | jayy | 70% | 243 |
| #4 | kah | 67% | 138 |
| #5 | PAUL!! | 65% | 46 |
| #6 | c̷o̷c̷o̷ჯට | 60% | 20 |
| #7 | granny_throttla | 55% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jayy | 22 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | kah | 12 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | ADN | 7 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | PAUL!! | 5 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | c̷o̷c̷o̷ჯට | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jayy | 695 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| #2 | kah | 645 | 0.24 | 17 min |
| #3 | ADN | 170 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | PAUL!! | 89 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | GURU | 60 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PAUL!! | +4.58 | 79 | 59 |
| #2 | GURU | +4.15 | 73 | 55 |
| #3 | ADN | +3.68 | 79 | 60 |
| #4 | gawrie | +2.69 | 82 | 64 |
| #5 | kah | +1.19 | 80 | 69 |





