








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 639 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 611 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 145 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7326 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29,130 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5600 | 19% |
| Smokes | 6309 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 8130 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 9091 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,514,946 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 716 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | H1er0 | 57% | 49 |
| #2 | ✪ Darkvision | 49% | 189 |
| #3 | ShitHeaD | 48% | 232 |
| #4 | Noname | 48% | 75 |
| #5 | Whispered | 47% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ✪ Darkvision | 49% | 189 |
| #3 | ShitHeaD | 48% | 232 |
| #4 | Noname | 48% | 75 |
| #5 | Whispered | 47% | 110 |
| #6 | Angry Pacifist | 45% | 345 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShitHeaD | 17 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | Noname | 12 | 0.0083 |
| #3 | Angry Pacifist | 11 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | H1er0 | 6 | 0.0062 |
| #5 | Whispered | 4 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Darkvision | 628 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| #2 | Angry Pacifist | 422 | 0.06 | 11 min |
| #3 | Noname | 358 | 0.25 | 10 min |
| #4 | H1er0 | 180 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | Whispered | 131 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Darkvision | +1.51 | 61 | 59 |
| #2 | Klamo | +1.30 | 61 | 52 |
| #3 | Noname | -0.16 | 59 | 72 |
| #4 | H1er0 | -0.30 | 27 | 52 |
| #5 | Angry Pacifist | -0.57 | 57 | 50 |





