








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 120 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 85 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2107 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,632 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 787 | 17% |
| Smokes | 928 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1276 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1641 | 35% |
Our logs show you have wasted $694,223 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 23 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | arkz | 45% | 11 |
| #8 | ncorbino | 43% | 14 |
| #9 | NotGood334 | 38% | 13 |
| #10 | Incognito | 38% | 13 |
| #11 | Lexx | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ttv: OneLargePigeon | 6 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Pockett | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | rileysfate | 2 | 0.0062 |
| #4 | Notre_ | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | keltic | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ttv: OneLargePigeon | 264 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #2 | keltic | 103 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | Lexx | 94 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #4 | rileysfate | 87 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| #5 | Notre_ | 83 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pockett | +2.00 | 81 | 40 |
| #2 | rileysfate | +1.63 | 55 | 61 |
| #3 | keltic | +0.87 | 83 | 68 |
| #4 | ttv: OneLargePigeon | +0.76 | 59 | 58 |
| #5 | ncorbino | +0.67 | 62 | 70 |





