








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 256 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1950 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,928 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1710 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1592 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1503 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1123 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $595,339 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 38 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Faalini | 60% | 53 |
| #2 | Kronek | 55% | 47 |
| #3 | MORBAZHA | 49% | 92 |
| #4 | tPoi$zon | 47% | 81 |
| #5 | The real Hogan | 46% | 80 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tPoi$zon | 8 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | MOTHER F@CCO | 6 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | The real Hogan | 6 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | MORBAZHA | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | dewis | 4 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MOTHER F@CCO | 310 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #2 | tPoi$zon | 193 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #3 | dewis | 136 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #4 | Kronek | 109 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | MORBAZHA | 104 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tPoi$zon | +3.79 | 72 | 72 |
| #2 | Faalini | +2.19 | 67 | 65 |
| #3 | Brother Keegel | +1.83 | 64 | 68 |
| #4 | MORBAZHA | +0.06 | 61 | 59 |
| #5 | Kronek | -0.09 | 59 | 77 |





