








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 979 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 571 matches | ||
| Faceit | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5868 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,861 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8413 | 31% |
| Smokes | 5828 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 6156 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 6464 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,148,281 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1075 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sanders | 52% | 83 |
| #2 | Nanami | 51% | 57 |
| #3 | Jappinator | 48% | 61 |
| #4 | Salkin | 47% | 83 |
| #5 | yapE | 47% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Salkin | 47% | 83 |
| #5 | yapE | 47% | 77 |
| #6 | xaxaxaxaxaxaxax | 45% | 77 |
| #7 | Snek | 43% | 115 |
| #8 | ZenturionEy | 41% | 353 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZenturionEy | 65 | 0.0087 |
| #2 | xaxaxaxaxaxaxax | 13 | 0.0080 |
| #3 | Jappinator | 13 | 0.0101 |
| #4 | sanders | 7 | 0.0039 |
| #5 | Salkin | 6 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snek | 356 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #2 | ZenturionEy | 289 | 0.04 | 7 min |
| #3 | Jappinator | 217 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #4 | sanders | 207 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #5 | Salkin | 191 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xaxaxaxaxaxaxax | +5.56 | 84 | 35 |
| #2 | Salkin | +3.26 | 66 | 67 |
| #3 | yapE | +1.76 | 56 | 61 |
| #4 | Snek | +0.95 | 56 | 67 |
| #5 | Nanami | +0.70 | 44 | 50 |





