








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 52 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1101 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,420 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1205 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1568 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1232 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1415 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $439,470 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 45 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Lek Lek | 46% | 28 |
| #9 | <3 | 44% | 16 |
| #10 | Uhtred | 42% | 12 |
| #11 | heather | 38% | 21 |
| #12 | mirageCS | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Soyul | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | veronica | 5 | 0.0072 |
| #3 | 喜び | 3 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | Craqk | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | Uhtred | 2 | 0.0077 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Soyul | 406 | 0.23 | 9 min |
| #2 | veronica | 172 | 0.25 | 4 min |
| #3 | 喜び | 112 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | Uhtred | 101 | 0.39 | 2 min |
| #5 | Lek Lek | 94 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | veronica | +5.99 | 90 | 65 |
| #2 | 喜び | +4.32 | 87 | 53 |
| #3 | Soyul | +2.66 | 84 | 62 |
| #4 | heather | +2.38 | 87 | 71 |
| #5 | ⍟quack | +2.18 | 81 | 62 |





