








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
282 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 915 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 247 | 27% |
| Smokes | 230 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 272 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 166 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $61,983 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 91 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eliddinn | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | dieuman | 75% | 4 |
| #3 | TheCarrotBandit | 63% | 8 |
| #4 | snakey | 62% | 13 |
| #5 | HDWVEA | 50% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | spice | 3 | 0.0714 |
| #2 | Snodz | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | snakey | 1 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | dieuman | 1 | 0.0123 |
| #5 | Doodles | 1 | 0.0233 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snodz | +5.50 | 96 | 25 |
| #2 | Mog | +2.97 | 79 | 60 |
| #3 | adadadad | +1.95 | 75 | 61 |
| #4 | Doodles | +1.60 | 39 | 54 |
| #5 | M i n c h e r z | +1.19 | 92 | 58 |





