








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 370 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 181 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 35 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




44 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8607 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,117 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1985 | 14% |
| Smokes | 3369 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3678 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 5085 | 36% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,289,035 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 767 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Chelsea | 46% | 215 |
| #6 | Rechless | 44% | 36 |
| #7 | dayv | 43% | 37 |
| #8 | Captain ☠Failure☠ | 40% | 43 |
| #9 | Gugus, Glutton of Crayons | 36% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ritch | 19 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Gugus, Glutton of Crayons | 11 | 0.0166 |
| #3 | Woods | 10 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | James | 7 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Chelsea | 3 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ritch | 616 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #2 | Chelsea | 504 | 0.11 | 13 min |
| #3 | James | 344 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| #4 | Woods | 200 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | Captain ☠Failure☠ | 136 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Punkk | +4.25 | 89 | 51 |
| #2 | James | +2.59 | 81 | 74 |
| #3 | dayv | +1.13 | 78 | 41 |
| #4 | Captain ☠Failure☠ | +0.66 | 74 | 54 |
| #5 | Ritch | -0.61 | 74 | 42 |





