








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 512 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 403 matches | ||
| Wingman | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 43 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3021 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,136 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5552 | 26% |
| Smokes | 4715 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 5937 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 4932 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,750,760 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 382 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Timo | 61% | 31 |
| #2 | waLnut | 61% | 51 |
| #3 | CRU_ | 49% | 358 |
| #4 | Lyx | 46% | 323 |
| #5 | MrHuman/Dancer | 45% | 280 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | waLnut | 61% | 51 |
| #3 | CRU_ | 49% | 358 |
| #4 | Lyx | 46% | 323 |
| #5 | MrHuman/Dancer | 45% | 280 |
| #6 | azzuro | 41% | 208 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CRU_ | 17 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Lyx | 14 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | azzuro | 14 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | MrHuman/Dancer | 10 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | waLnut | 3 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CRU_ | 1136 | 0.15 | 31 min |
| #2 | Lyx | 657 | 0.10 | 16 min |
| #3 | MrHuman/Dancer | 463 | 0.08 | 11 min |
| #4 | azzuro | 222 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #5 | waLnut | 146 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | waLnut | +5.03 | 89 | 66 |
| #2 | Timo | +2.91 | 78 | 50 |
| #3 | CRU_ | +2.08 | 74 | 71 |
| #4 | azzuro | +0.41 | 33 | 55 |
| #5 | MrHuman/Dancer | -0.13 | 32 | 69 |





