








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
415 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 776 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 267 | 34% |
| Smokes | 294 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 94 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 121 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $56,559 of utility $43 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | QuakK | 58% | 31 |
| #2 | GhostFish | 57% | 30 |
| #3 | Superior Crustacean | 56% | 27 |
| #4 | Dhar Mann (real) | 52% | 23 |
| #5 | K33GAN | 44% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | QuakK | 50 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #2 | Servalipp | 39 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | Dhar Mann (real) | 36 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | GhostFish | 33 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | NØZ | 25 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | QuakK | +9.62 | 82 | 66 |
| #2 | K33GAN | +4.29 | 77 | 46 |
| #3 | NØZ | +2.91 | 80 | 37 |
| #4 | 2k warrior | +1.90 | 79 | 24 |
| #5 | Dhar Mann (real) | +0.69 | 68 | 47 |





