








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 482 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September

The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 168 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1057 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,750 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1143 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1239 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 294 | 8% |
| Molotovs | 1074 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $945,058 of utility $208 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 619 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lambiii'- | 57% | 77 |
| #2 | Filip | 56% | 32 |
| #3 | Gooseberry | 53% | 32 |
| #4 | Toyota Corolla | 53% | 19 |
| #5 | 0 K | 50% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bananaman | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | invizzy BAM Im back | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | 0 K | 3 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | Lambiii'- | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | oli | 2 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lambiii'- | 309 | 0.19 | 10 min |
| #2 | invizzy BAM Im back | 232 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #3 | Grilljanne | 181 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #4 | oli | 128 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | Bananaman | 73 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oli | +5.15 | 83 | 74 |
| #2 | Toyota Corolla | +4.84 | 84 | 72 |
| #3 | Lambiii'- | +4.80 | 83 | 76 |
| #4 | invizzy BAM Im back | +4.67 | 65 | 68 |
| #5 | Grilljanne | +4.32 | 73 | 70 |





