








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 129 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 11 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
433 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,060 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 97 | 9% |
| Smokes | 251 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 338 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 374 | 35% |
Our logs show you have wasted $217,263 of utility $192 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 65 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sladsie747 | 63% | 19 |
| #2 | Cakkum | 45% | 49 |
| #3 | Seed | 44% | 25 |
| #4 | Sladsie | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sladsie747 | 63% | 19 |
| #2 | Cakkum | 45% | 49 |
| #3 | Seed | 44% | 25 |
| #4 | Sladsie | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cakkum | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | Seed | 1 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Sladsie | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Sladsie747 | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sladsie747 | 62 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #2 | Sladsie | 46 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #3 | Seed | 36 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | Cakkum | 24 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sladsie | +2.25 | 76 | 67 |
| #2 | colourblind | +1.68 | 75 | 39 |
| #3 | Sladsie747 | +1.54 | 81 | 68 |
| #4 | Seed | -1.19 | 55 | 50 |
| #5 | Cakkum | -1.65 | 47 | 30 |





