








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 86 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1283 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,464 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 918 | 27% |
| Smokes | 782 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 715 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1049 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $663,824 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | beige | 64% | 11 |
| #2 | VOYAG3R | 59% | 29 |
| #3 | Mythical_FnS_ | 55% | 11 |
| #4 | ohms | 52% | 44 |
| #5 | ☃toaf | 52% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KLB | 157 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #2 | ohms | 125 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #3 | ☃toaf | 91 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | KLB | 81 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | Mythical_FnS_ | 61 | 0.26 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VOYAG3R | +4.24 | 53 | 67 |
| #2 | r00[sz] | +4.03 | 72 | 50 |
| #3 | KLB | +3.52 | 68 | 68 |
| #4 | ohms | +2.87 | 83 | 65 |
| #5 | ☃toaf | +2.21 | 66 | 63 |





