








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 340 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 35 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1864 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,798 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2044 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2073 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1825 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1856 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $459,826 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 390 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dat_Guy_Burney | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | Doolphin | 65% | 17 |
| #3 | moj | 62% | 21 |
| #4 | Mythical_FnS_ | 57% | 23 |
| #5 | HesBackBaby | 56% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zapp! | 7 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | Infin8ty | 5 | 0.0089 |
| #3 | Mythical_FnS_ | 5 | 0.0111 |
| #4 | TurT1e | 4 | 0.0111 |
| #5 | moj | 3 | 0.0070 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TurT1e | +2.36 | 87 | 68 |
| #2 | KLB | +2.08 | 68 | 66 |
| #3 | Dat_Guy_Burney | +1.30 | 55 | 49 |
| #4 | Zapp! | +1.23 | 47 | 47 |
| #5 | Gwimweapo | +1.22 | 74 | 63 |





