








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 449 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 175 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3275 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,684 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3255 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3826 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4182 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3421 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,078,836 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 356 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | r00[sz] | 53% | 118 |
| #2 | MoJo JoJo | 52% | 44 |
| #3 | HRS | 52% | 27 |
| #4 | ☃toaf | 49% | 265 |
| #5 | beige | 49% | 115 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | babytron | 47% | 34 |
| #7 | HesBackBaby | 46% | 48 |
| #8 | KLB | 43% | 28 |
| #9 | ✪ Max | 39% | 31 |
| #10 | wallstre3t | 32% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☃toaf | 5 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | r00[sz] | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | beige | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | MoJo JoJo | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | HesBackBaby | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☃toaf | 580 | 0.11 | 18 min |
| #2 | beige | 259 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | babytron | 133 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | r00[sz] | 110 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #5 | MoJo JoJo | 108 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HRS | +1.37 | 86 | 62 |
| #2 | ohms | +1.21 | 76 | 62 |
| #3 | r00[sz] | +0.98 | 73 | 52 |
| #4 | ☃toaf | +0.80 | 61 | 64 |
| #5 | ✪ Max | +0.49 | 75 | 50 |





